Where is “The One?”

Arizona Life Coaching

I’m sure you know someone who is single that says, “All the good ones are taken” or “I’m waiting for ‘the one’ to find me.” Most of my friends are single; men and women, young and not-so-young. Here’s how to take control of your love life and effortlessly find “the one.”

The Law of Attraction (or “The Secret”) works in an amazing way. In order to manifest or draw in that which we desire, we must speak in a way that brings it. When you speak or think of things you are wanting in your life, the Universe or Higher Power doesn’t designate “don’t or do.”

When I was in a difficult marriage, an unhealthy relationship, or even dating when I, myself, was single, I would say “I don’t want him to do the things he does, or I don’t want this relationship to continue like this, or I don’t want to meet a narcissist.” What I was doing was sending an energy into the universe that translated as “I want…” So I continued to get what I was sending out- Where attention goes, energy flows… I was sending a message and it was the wrong one. This is actually Step 2, but I needed you to hear this first. Now the biggie…

Step 1: Before you can even begin to manifest the Law of Attraction, you must understand that the Law of Attraction is a MIRROR of you. You must heal the things in you that are unfinished, painful, angry, and empty. This is SO important. If you do not completely love and accept yourself, how will anyone else? Many people are searching for their “other half…” No, No, No, No… Why would you want half a person/mate? Why would you want to be an incomplete companion to someone?

As I went from marriage to long term relationships, I realized I had never had time to fully get to know ME or love ME. I spent 2 years alone and found myself by learning boundaries, and doing things that I enjoyed. It truly helped me love myself and learn to like my own company– finally I was alone but not lonely. And then…. my future husband found me.

Coincidence? I think not. Now that’s not to say you will be fully ready all at one.  My now husband and I dated for 4 months and I still had growing to do and broke it off for another 6 months. In that time, we both needed additional healing to fully appreciate and love one another. After that, we reunited and we were our best selves and ready for a very healthy marriage. We communicate well, we willingly share responsibilities, we respect and speak to one another with kindness, and we have an emotional and spiritual bond.

The beauty of this discovery is that it can happen at any time.  In your 20’s, 30’s, 40’s, and even your 80’s.  Don’t be so quick to find “the one”, until you have self reflected, spent time completely alone, and embraced and continue to love who you are. Then your true match or mirror will be impossible to miss… no searching needed!
Love and Blessings,