When I started my Coaching business, I approached it with the intent of focusing on the psychology and understanding of why and how we make the choices we do in life: Why we repeat behavior, fail to understand ourselves and our worth. I took NLP courses, CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) and recently even a Forensic Psychology Certification course.
Through the growth of coaching, I evolved (just kinda flowed, actually) into understanding more spiritually the Law of Attraction and the greater purpose of our lives, and the simplicity of the message-it’s all about love and compassion-to ourselves and others.
People have many names for this evolution: Lightworker, Awakening, Raising Vibration, Energetic healing, etc. It has helped me tremendously in my personal life as well as my Coaching.
As I wrote my book, “My Dog is More Enlightened Than I Am“, I wasn’t really aware of it, but I didn’t write it as a lecture or a “professional guide to awakening”. I simply wrote it as I speak. I explain my growth through my experiences and give suggestions on how easy it is to integrate it into everyone’s life. It’s a gentle nudge and encouragement to those who read it.
This being said, I’ve noticed that quite a few people in the metaphysical and Coaching world tend to lecture others. Albeit probably not intentionally, but it does rear its ugly head.
Here are some of the phrases I have heard: “You need to, You should, You shouldn’t, etc”. I prefer these: What do you think? How does that feel? What would make you feel better? I deliberately choose not to lecture. The best example I have to give is this: My wonderful adult children.
I learned that I do not have to “mother” my children any longer. What, you say? Yes, I will always be their mother, but I no longer have to teach them right from wrong or how to make decisions and choices. I am now their friend, confidante, mentor, encourager and sounding board. I do not need to LECTURE them on life. This discovery of letting them make choices and just being there to listen has been life changing for us all. They are more open with me, and actually ask my opinion now.
A friend of mine recently said, “Just because someone is gifted, doesn’t mean they are enlightened”. That really hit home as I thought, “but surely if they have a psychic gift they are using, they understand how to use it in the most genuine and loving way intended”.
Not necessarily. Unfortunately, like every arena in life, some people are misguided, or still have lessons to learn themselves. I strive to learn more about every aspect of life I can to help others to HELP THEMSELVES. If I lecture, it instills a feeling of inadequacy, guilt, insecurity, and helplessness-which is contrary to what I want to do- which is to show others how capable, amazing, wonderful, and adequate they are, but they must learn this within.
Remember that nothing you say to someone about their shortcomings will benefit them, instead, plant the seeds of encouragement and let them water it themselves.
Let’s keep in mind, we are all human and this life is a constant journey of learning every…single…day. My friend, Laura, said to me, “I’m still a work in progress”, and I replied, “As we all are”- that’s our purpose, to keep progressing!
Love and Blessings,